December 13, 2007

1:30pm, Hotel Room 1037, White Swan, Guangzhou, China

Hopefully you are napping now. I say hopefully because unlike the last 2 days, today you are not cooperating. You aren't being loud or crying or such, but you won't go to sleep. You were very, very close a few times but then you'd find something to do. Once you picked up your little crib pillow and just started cackling. You thought that pillow was so funny for some reason.

Well, so much for hoping - Katie just brought you into the room (we have adjoining rooms) wide awake. You were saying "I Bi Di." That means you need to go to the bathroom. That is pronounced "I Buy Die." We don't know the exact translation but we made the connection between those words and the action the first night with you in the hotel. The young lady from the orphanage confirmed the meaning the next morning at the Civil Affairs office.

On the subject of words, you have said a few. "A, O, I" (pronounced as you read the capital letters A-O-I) means you want down. You sa Ba Ba, daddy. You've said Ma Ma a few times, mommy. Once you pointed to pictures of your sisters and said "gei gei," big sister (pronounced jshee jshee). Once, on day two with you, your sisters and I heard a very distinct "I do it!" We all looked at each other in amazement thinking we had all heard the same thing. It's the only time you have said it, so maybe we were just imagining it. Your actions at the time sure fit the words though so who knows. You have learned a soft "thank you." Mom and the girls have taught you to sign "more please" when eating. You are now signing "thank you" following the "more please" but you do it immediately following "more please" so I'm not sure you understand the concept of "thank you" yet.

That's about the end of communication so far except for one other significant item. Unfortunately we haven't figured out how to resolve this one. You have a very distinct moan you make when something isn't right. The moan doesn't indicate what's wrong and that's what makes it hard to resolve. You just "aaa...aaa...aaa..." on and on. You had done this once already with no big ordeal when the night before last it happened again, this time for real. It wasn't hard to figure this one out though, you were hungry and it was our fault. This was on day 2 and it was late. After 2 days of activities, official and unofficial, we had pushed you near the limit. You were tired and hungry and tried to let us know. "Aaa...aaa...aaa..." and we were walking to the restaurant. It took 10 or more minutes so we got out the peanuts and they calmed you. Once in the restaurant you started again "aaa...aaa...aaa..." The food didn't come fast enough and you could not be consoled. You started to cry, loudly! Huge tears showed up instantly and started to roll down your cheeks. Some kids are just pitiful when they cry. You are one of them. The eyes, the tears, the cry... all coupled with your past, just breaks my heart. Since you are still more of daddy's girl than anything, I took you outside, peanuts in hand. After just 2 peanuts you calmed down and relaxed. You and I just hung out outside until the food was served. Our interpretation of this scenario was that you didn't have confidence yet that you were going to be fed. The "aaa's" were the sign "I'm hungry" and the all out crying was your realization "I'm not getting fed." Only it wasn't reality, we just hadn't been served the food yet and couldn't feed you. I think we worked through it ok, you just need more time to gain complete confidence in us, know that you will be cared for (including food), and of course a common language. All in due time.

By the way, it's 2:15 and you're still not asleep. This could mean trouble because at 3:30 we leave for your medical exam. We shouldn't be gone long but you may get ornery having not slept. If you do fall asleep, you won't sleep long enough and we will have to wake you up. This happened yesterday and you didn't like it.

Because you are older and so independent, many of the Chinese ladies, CCAI guides and hotel staff, try to talk to you, especially when you are being a little stubborn. A few have commented that they don't think you understand them. You certainly give no indication you understand them. You either just stare blankly or continue doing what you're doing as if they don't exist. Your life so far has been lived in Shantou. That's in Guangdong province just like Guangzhou. However in Shantou the language is different. From what we have been told the dialect there is very, very different and very, very, difficult. Whereas Mandarin is spoken and understood in many places throughout China, and where some can communicate across dialects, in Shantou it's different. Our guide in Beijing said she would not be able to communicate in Shantou. I would think that is hard on you also. Nothing you say, or nothing you hear said, is understood. You seem to work through this though. God's grace in your life and ours.

On a happy note, you love to play... hard, very hard! When you play, you have the biggest grin. You're definitely a Brown. When you smile, your eyes close just like dad's. You laugh loudly. You cackle and giggle and make the best "happy" sounds. You play all out. Full speed should be your middle name. You like to play on the bed which makes me nervous. Our first "no" has been about standing on the bed to play. You lay on the bed and thrash. You kick your feet, turn your head side to side wildly, swing your arms and just laugh. You still love playing with the soft squishy ball mom brought for you. No rolling though, you prefer to throw and catch. I think when we get home and you have lots of room to roam, that you will really enjoy this. The houses are bigger of course. Likewise the inside of the house, each room, is much, much bigger than in China. Outside will consist of a yard which will be new to you. Here there are parks scattered around but obviously not everyone gets to go there often. There are just too many people for that. How will you react to the beach? That will be an entirely new experience for you. Lots of sunshine, white sand, and water, water everywhere. Waves too! Sand castles, picnics, burying people in the sand, and more waves. That's just the beginning of all the fun we will have little girl. How about learning to ride a bike? Playing sports (soccer, running, track & field, etc), playing with Hank (the dog), outside activities, kayaking, boat rides, etc. What a wonderful time we will have.

It's time for me to go now. We have to wake you up to get ready for your medical exam. This exam is needed to get your travel visa. You haven't been alseep along time so we'll see how this goes. Quietly or not so quietly, makes no difference. I love you and we'll be ok. Love dad.